Saturday, February 22, 2014

The Fear of Change

Over the past few days I have been talking with my step son on an opportunity that has popped up for him and his concerns or worries about his future, and to not just "settle" for his present situation and our conversation got me thinking a lot about fear—and, in particular, overcoming it. While I'm not a one who ever thought about it, I did not embrace it, not that I was jumping out of airplanes or diving into shark-infested waters, I've battled with my own fears in life, particularly the fear of change. There have been turning points in my life when I knew I needed to make a change in order to make my life better, but I was scared. For the purposes of this conversation let's define change as "a modification to a person's environment, situation, or physical/mental condition that results in circumstances that challenge their existing paradigms." What our definition implies is that humans have a tendency to define how their world is supposed to work. Whenever something happens in our personal world or to our own being that is inconsistent with the way we feel the world should be, we encounter change.
Looking back now, I'd stay where I was, doing what I'd done, paralyzed by the fear that I wouldn't be able to initiate (or stick with) the change I knew needed to take place. So for years I "settled" and didn't even realize it. Until I had no choice and I was unceremoniously dismissed from a JOB of 20 years. It took awhile for me to realize that the whole time, I was really just "Comfortably Miserable" for 20 years.
Change that just happens to you can be scary—but it's often out of your control completely so there's little or no build up to it (and if there is, it's often something you can do nothing about and you have no choice but to face your fear). But when it comes to change that you initiate—such as seeking out a new job, leaving your partner, or choosing to move to a new country—fear is a much bigger part of the equation. Since the choice is within your control, you can put an end to it and stop your fear (even if that means staying put and staying unhappy).
So what we all need, as I did have in place, is a BACK UP PLAN, something that you devote a few hours a week, a proven business plan, and a successful organization and a great team. As we like to say "Team Work, makes The dream Work"!!










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